Why Life Isn’t Going Your Way

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I look at things like this if you are 30 years old or older and can’t afford to spend $500 on something, more than likely, you’re the problem. Call it poor decision making or whatever but I think it’s deeper than that. This year has been very interesting for me. I’ve learned a lot about people but more importantly I’ve learned about myself. Had it not been for my smokin’ hot and highly intelligent wife, God and Boulder Crest Retreat, who knows what country I’d be in and what I’d be doing.

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I’ve been trying to wrap my mind around issues buddies of mine have with being “broke”. Not physically, but in the wallet. It truly baffles me when a buddy will call or message me to catch up and they are telling me how bad life is for them. I try not to offer the “quick fix” but it usually heads that direction. Most the time the issue is money. They can’t pay their rent, house payment or other bills. I’m thinking, “Dude, you’re 43 years old and you can’t pay your bills? Why”? Those people then go on to talk about how there are no jobs or people just aren’t willing to pay them what they are worth. There’s gonna come a point when you just have to wonder, “Maybe it’s me”. Ya think?! There is a whole world out there with thousands of ways to make money. I can only guess it’s one of a few things.

  1. You’re lazy. If you’re looking for candy canes and lollipops and the river of fudge to swim in, you’re gonna get your feelings hurt. The most successful people in this world, I didn’t say wealthiest, are those people who are willing to work the hardest. You may have a million dollar idea but unless you’re willing to sweat and bleed over it that idea will always remain an idea. Long hours and, most importantly, an unyielding level of commitment is what will get you there. Nothing really worth going after is easy. Roll up your sleeves and dig in.
  2. Experience/Education, or lack thereof. People go to college or some sort of “higher education” and expect to go into that field and make it big. Rose colored glasses. Whether you exit high school, college or do like me and take the G.E.D. route, your learning does not stop there. You HAVE to seek self-improvement. You should ALWAYS strive to learn something new, even if you’re not interested in the subject matter. Lack of experience/education will place you in the long line of the unemployed with everyone scratching their heads wondering why they aren’t landing that big job.
  3. In the Army, as a Sergeant, I was taught to “Seek responsibility and accept responsibility for your actions”. That’s a leadership trait. Not everyone can be a leader; no matter how many try. Be, Know, Do. People fail to accept responsibility for their failures or setbacks. Blaming the world, the government, your ex, your neighbor, your parents, your teachers, etc. etc. seems to be the norm. If more people would just stop, look in the mirror and say, “I screwed up and it’s my fault. I’m going to change right now”. People would be amazed at how things will turn around. SEEK responsibility and people will seek you. Learn to humble yourself and accept responsibility for your failures, setbacks, and mistakes.
  4. Motivation and Positive Mindset. If you don’t have a WHY to what you are doing or what you want then you’ll never get there. I used to tell my gym members, “If you think you can’t, you probably won’t”. I would watch someone walk up to the bar to pull their all-time record Deadlift and say, “I know about this”. I’d simply tell them, “I do, you won’t make that lift”. Then I’d tell them to step away and give them the good ole Bryan Hood “Rocky” type motivational speech. We switch the mindset. I’d tell them to close their eyes and visualize it. Not many people are going to visualize failure. They’d visualize the lift and I’d tell them, “You’ve already completed the lift in your head. Now do it for real”. Yes, it will be hard and if you’re using a “Hook Grip” it’ll hurt. You take the pain with the success. Every great warrior has felt pain on their journey to greatness. That’s why you have to earn it.

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Number 4 is probably the most important one to me. It truly baffles me and makes me want to slap someone and shake them at how little they think of themselves. How unworthy they think they are. EVERY human being is capable of greatness and success in life; no matter how you define success. So here’s my advice for the day. Quit blaming the world. Where you are right now is your fault. No one else’s. Where you are right now is not due to being born into poverty, being beaten by your parents, abused by your uncle or because of your looks. It’s due to your mindset and lack of action, persistence and commitment. You are only limited by what you think you are capable of accomplishing. If you wanna live a hard life, roger that, enjoy. Just don’t blame anyone but yourself and don’t spread your disease of failure.

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“So, Bryan, what do I do now”? Take a step down a new path. One step at a time, one foot in front of the other. It’s not easy. “Fake it til you make it” has so much truth to it. When the world pushes at you, you push back. Never settle for mediocrity. You were designed for greatness!! Prove it. Learn SOMETHING today. If you sit in your PJ’s all day playing xBox and complain cause no one has called you back for a job, it’s your fault. You know one of the greatest things about living in America? Free enterprise. When you can take a rock and write “Pet Rock” on it and sell it, you’re in the right place. Sure, you can go work for someone else, there’s nothing wrong with that. It’s just not for me. I choose to dictate my own schedule, what I wear, where I go and will allow no one to tell me what I’m worth. No one will place a cap on what I’m capable of doing or making. Learn new skills to make yourself more marketable, more attractive. I love that movie, “Pursuit of Happyness”. Yes, I know it’s misspelled. Remember these words: Competence, Candor, Courage and Commitment. All winners in life display those traits. That’s what it takes to crush life.

“Dictated but not read” – Abraham Lincoln

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